So Long. Farewell.
I know, I’m late. Instead of watching last night, I spent two hours and 20 minutes voting non-stop for the only person in this competition who deserves to win. And I have this to say to any of you who didn’t vote for Elliott- shame on you. Shame on you for supporting a third rate wedding singer who, by the looks of it, should turn in his sobriety chip. Shame on you for panting over a bitchy, nasty oversinger who has stuck her tits out and would fake smile through the sinking of the Titanic, which is what most of her performances resemble, anyway. And shame on this bullshit show for not realizing that the most talented person should win, not the one they manipulate the voters into backing by giving extra time to, and publicly proclaiming as the final two. Yeah, I don’t know what has gotten into me, caring so much about someone I don’t even know, but without going into a whole psychoanalytical rant, I think I identify with Elliott. I get him. He’s a guy who comes out and does his best every time, no matter what is thrown at him. He rightly expects that his talent should be the only thing that matters. And even when he’s shown the cold hard truth, that in this business, talent has very little to do with anything, he keeps pushing on, determined to not be pulled under because of it.
I know Elliott will be going home tonight and that two less talented, less deserving singers will be continuing on, both of whom will be given recording contracts undeservedly. I can only hope that somehow Elliott will be given the opportunity to further share his gift with us. This week will be my last re-cap. I am going to combine Tuesday and Wednesday into one last hurrah. I have no intention of watching next week’s shows. I don’t care who wins. I can’t stand either of the final two and to watch either of them crowned the next Idol would make me sick to my stomach. And I guarantee you all would not want to hear what I had to say for those final two hours.
So thanks to all of you who have hung out with me this season and read my work. If I am in a position where I have the time to do this for Rock Star over the summer, then I will try to be there for that. I’ve appreciated all your great e-mails and posts and it’s been fun getting to know (most of) you.
Starting with Tuesday night- Ryan needs a shave once again. Thankfully I’ll be done with his boring, untalented ass after this week. And perhaps a speeding bus will take care of the rest for me. Seacrest starts off with a reminder that Chris has been voted off. Yes, we all know, we were there. And Chris has wasted no time on all the talk shows he’s been booked on telling anyone who will listen that yes, it was a shock, because everyone expected him to win. Sorry, everyone “told” him he was going to win. And supposedly Fuel offered him a job as their new lead singer. Excellent. I’ll be sure and go see them the next time the county fair rolls into town.
Clive Davis is in the audience tonight, but not, as in years past, judging along with RPS. The producers do a little history/tribute to Clive, mentioning his starting out at Columbia Records, then starting his own label, Arista, in 1975. What they left out in between that was Clive was let go from Columbia after they found out he was mismanaging and embezzling funds from the company. Yeah, somehow I didn’t expect that to make the tribute. He is described as the most influential recording executive of all time, yet he can’t seem to choose three appropriate songs for the contestants.
Elliott is up first because even though he hasn’t gone last in almost six weeks, TPTB aren’t about to give him a pimp spot when they can feature Taylor at the end. Clive has chosen the “rock song” Open Arms by Journey for Elliott. He says he wants to see Elliott try something different. Elliott is polite and gracious, even though he knows Clive has made sure he’s gonna tank on at least one performance. Elliott says it’s an honor to meet Clive and looks forward to working with him on future projects. Clive shakes his head no as he thanks Elliott.
Elliott sounds good, if a little unsure on the song. He reverses a lyric, but does it so seamlessly that it doesn’t look like a flub. Why is this song only 30 seconds long? He didn’t even get out a whole verse? What the fuck is THAT??? How can you criticize that? Randy and Paula give him decent but unspectacular criticism. Simon tells him to loosen up and believe he can make it into the finals. If only Simon wasn’t trying to sabotage him. I can’t even critique that performance because it was so fucking short.
Katharine is up next and Clive has assigned to her “I Believe I Can Fly,” by R. Kelly. Kee-rist, I hate that song. In a nutshell, Clive tells Katharine he wants to make it her own because basically, she imitates Whitney and Alicia too much. He says he wants her to find her own sound so when they record together she can show it. Notice he didn’t say anything about recording with Elliott. Another subtle pimp. And of course, Katharine is turned toward the camera with her legs in a mini skirt.
Okay, I can’t do this. I’m trying, but all it’s going to come out as is just bitter bitter bitter with no humor. I’m not particularly feeling very funny right now and why subject you to reading just me complaining with nothing to counter it? After watching McPhee smile and burp her way through that song and hear Simon blatantly ignore how bad it was and hearing Katharine talk back to the judges like she’s already entitled? No, can’t do it. I’m sorry.
Enjoy the rest of the season. Seagulls out.
I know Elliott will be going home tonight and that two less talented, less deserving singers will be continuing on, both of whom will be given recording contracts undeservedly. I can only hope that somehow Elliott will be given the opportunity to further share his gift with us. This week will be my last re-cap. I am going to combine Tuesday and Wednesday into one last hurrah. I have no intention of watching next week’s shows. I don’t care who wins. I can’t stand either of the final two and to watch either of them crowned the next Idol would make me sick to my stomach. And I guarantee you all would not want to hear what I had to say for those final two hours.
So thanks to all of you who have hung out with me this season and read my work. If I am in a position where I have the time to do this for Rock Star over the summer, then I will try to be there for that. I’ve appreciated all your great e-mails and posts and it’s been fun getting to know (most of) you.
Starting with Tuesday night- Ryan needs a shave once again. Thankfully I’ll be done with his boring, untalented ass after this week. And perhaps a speeding bus will take care of the rest for me. Seacrest starts off with a reminder that Chris has been voted off. Yes, we all know, we were there. And Chris has wasted no time on all the talk shows he’s been booked on telling anyone who will listen that yes, it was a shock, because everyone expected him to win. Sorry, everyone “told” him he was going to win. And supposedly Fuel offered him a job as their new lead singer. Excellent. I’ll be sure and go see them the next time the county fair rolls into town.
Clive Davis is in the audience tonight, but not, as in years past, judging along with RPS. The producers do a little history/tribute to Clive, mentioning his starting out at Columbia Records, then starting his own label, Arista, in 1975. What they left out in between that was Clive was let go from Columbia after they found out he was mismanaging and embezzling funds from the company. Yeah, somehow I didn’t expect that to make the tribute. He is described as the most influential recording executive of all time, yet he can’t seem to choose three appropriate songs for the contestants.
Elliott is up first because even though he hasn’t gone last in almost six weeks, TPTB aren’t about to give him a pimp spot when they can feature Taylor at the end. Clive has chosen the “rock song” Open Arms by Journey for Elliott. He says he wants to see Elliott try something different. Elliott is polite and gracious, even though he knows Clive has made sure he’s gonna tank on at least one performance. Elliott says it’s an honor to meet Clive and looks forward to working with him on future projects. Clive shakes his head no as he thanks Elliott.
Elliott sounds good, if a little unsure on the song. He reverses a lyric, but does it so seamlessly that it doesn’t look like a flub. Why is this song only 30 seconds long? He didn’t even get out a whole verse? What the fuck is THAT??? How can you criticize that? Randy and Paula give him decent but unspectacular criticism. Simon tells him to loosen up and believe he can make it into the finals. If only Simon wasn’t trying to sabotage him. I can’t even critique that performance because it was so fucking short.
Katharine is up next and Clive has assigned to her “I Believe I Can Fly,” by R. Kelly. Kee-rist, I hate that song. In a nutshell, Clive tells Katharine he wants to make it her own because basically, she imitates Whitney and Alicia too much. He says he wants her to find her own sound so when they record together she can show it. Notice he didn’t say anything about recording with Elliott. Another subtle pimp. And of course, Katharine is turned toward the camera with her legs in a mini skirt.
Okay, I can’t do this. I’m trying, but all it’s going to come out as is just bitter bitter bitter with no humor. I’m not particularly feeling very funny right now and why subject you to reading just me complaining with nothing to counter it? After watching McPhee smile and burp her way through that song and hear Simon blatantly ignore how bad it was and hearing Katharine talk back to the judges like she’s already entitled? No, can’t do it. I’m sorry.
Enjoy the rest of the season. Seagulls out.
posted by kieran at 3:26 PM
2 Comments:
It's really too bad that it's all come down to this. Maybe there will be a surprise tonight. Who knows? Ah well, I've enjoyed your recaps this year.
hey kieran
i am literary ate on yaminions....and i did email you before there to let you know how much i enjoyed your writing and recaps. i live in singapore and got to watch the Final 3 show about 12 hours ago...i did read reviews of the show about 24 hours ago over the internet and i have been feeling very distraught as well ever since. But watching the show just (to quote paula) pierced the heart, and NOT in a good way. And I could not bear to watch it again, it just hurts too much. Like you, if Elliott goes home today (and i am pretty damn sure he will - the powers that be outdid themselves this time in pimping the undeserving to thus far unreached obscene levels), I won't be watching next week. And never again. It's great to be able to share this hurt with people who feel the same and care so much about Elliott. i havent been able to log on to Yaminions for the last 24 hours as well.....not sure if any one else can, or it's just the server being so busy from where i am on the planet. So it's been HARD!!!!!! I miss all the yaminions and how we could really get each other through during this hard time. I hope the site gets up and running fine again. Anyhow, thanks for your great articles. I printed them out and brought them in with me to brain-damaging meetings at work. They did the trick of making my soul smile, every time.
kathryn
sunkissedvirgo@yahoo.com
Post a Comment
<< Home