If You Knew Stevie
Now that we know they're gonna be cocking up Stevie W. I jotted down a few suggestions off the top of my head for each of the twelve. Basically, everyone's covered but Melissa. She's fucked. And Bucky has one choice and one choice only. Look for Covais to squeak by next week, if only because he can handle some of Stevie's middle-aged muzak better than the others.
I am going to assume no one will attempt any of the songs done in the past three weeks, though last season they had two people sing the exact same song in one night. I would say it would be safe to attempt You Are the Sunshine of My Life because it was far enough away and Brenna didn't so much as sing it as watch it search under the seat cushions for spare change.
Chris Daughtry: Higher Ground or Superstition.
Both are rock and HG was covered by the Chili Peppers. He's still going to unleash that shaky vibrato all over it, no matter what.
Taylor Hicks: I Was Made to Love Her or Signed, Sealed, Delivered
Stevie should be happy he won't be able to see Taylor's performance. I tried to remember which song had the most natural WHOOs in it, but I realized Taylor would add a few dozen extra, even if he were singing "The Woo Woo Song" by Jeffrey Osborne.
Elliott Yamin: Yester-Me Yester-You Yester-day, Sir Duke, That Girl, Send One Your Love
Elliott has sung Stevie and can probably handle him better than anyone in this group.
Bucky Covington: Pasttime Paradise
This is the song Coolio ripped off for Gangsta's Paradise. It's also the best chance Bucky has, though, as usual, they will have his mike turned down so low and he'll mumble so much, he could basically repeat "Peas and Carrots" for two minutes.
Kevin Covais: I Just Called to Say I Love You, Never Dreamed You'd Leave in Summer, They Won't Go When I Go
Kevin should and probably will pick the first one. It matches him and the Grandmas perfectly.
Ace Young: Ma Cherie Amour, Never Dreamed You'd Leave in Summer, That's What Friends are For, Ribbon in the Sky
Ace will stick to breathy, so the last two would be the best choices for him, though technically, TWFAF is only 1/4 a Stevie song. Still, if "Vehicle" can be classified as disco, then anything goes.
Mandisa: For Once in My Life, Do I Do
Mandisa could sing the Stevie Wonder phone book and jam. I'd personally love to see her take on Master Blaster, but I know that won't happen.
Katharine McPhee: Uptight, Part-Time Lover
I fear Kat has this ridiculous impression that because she sang an Aretha Franklin song last week that got praised unjustly, that she's the new Queen of Soul. If so, the first song would be a choice for her, and the title fits her perfectly.
Kellie Pickler: As
Kellie doesn't have much to choose from, either, but if she does sing As, there is a lot of room to countrify it naturally.
Lisa Tucker: You are the Sunshine of My Life, Ribbon in the Sky, They Won't Go When I Go.
Whatever she does, it's going to sound like the fourth round of Star Search. Maybe they'll let her accompany herself on that snazzy gold electric guitar.
Paris Bennett: Sir Duke, Never Had a Dream Come True, Don't You Worry 'Bout a Thing.
Webster probably thinks she can sing any Stevie song she chooses. HA! Look for her to be dressed in a daishiki and her wig to be conrowed and macramed.
Melissa: From the Bottom of My Heart
Someone is going to have to draw the short straw and be forced to sing one of Stevie's new songs, since he's a guest and we all have to pretend he's still relevant instead of admitting he hasn't written a decent song since 1982. Since there is NOTHING for Melissa to sing, otherwise, and they won't let her twirl a baton like she did in the Miss Mary Kay Cosmetics Pageant, she'll get stuck with the dog.
Boy, I wish Gedeon had stayed. He could have torn up on at least half a dozen songs.
I am going to assume no one will attempt any of the songs done in the past three weeks, though last season they had two people sing the exact same song in one night. I would say it would be safe to attempt You Are the Sunshine of My Life because it was far enough away and Brenna didn't so much as sing it as watch it search under the seat cushions for spare change.
Chris Daughtry: Higher Ground or Superstition.
Both are rock and HG was covered by the Chili Peppers. He's still going to unleash that shaky vibrato all over it, no matter what.
Taylor Hicks: I Was Made to Love Her or Signed, Sealed, Delivered
Stevie should be happy he won't be able to see Taylor's performance. I tried to remember which song had the most natural WHOOs in it, but I realized Taylor would add a few dozen extra, even if he were singing "The Woo Woo Song" by Jeffrey Osborne.
Elliott Yamin: Yester-Me Yester-You Yester-day, Sir Duke, That Girl, Send One Your Love
Elliott has sung Stevie and can probably handle him better than anyone in this group.
Bucky Covington: Pasttime Paradise
This is the song Coolio ripped off for Gangsta's Paradise. It's also the best chance Bucky has, though, as usual, they will have his mike turned down so low and he'll mumble so much, he could basically repeat "Peas and Carrots" for two minutes.
Kevin Covais: I Just Called to Say I Love You, Never Dreamed You'd Leave in Summer, They Won't Go When I Go
Kevin should and probably will pick the first one. It matches him and the Grandmas perfectly.
Ace Young: Ma Cherie Amour, Never Dreamed You'd Leave in Summer, That's What Friends are For, Ribbon in the Sky
Ace will stick to breathy, so the last two would be the best choices for him, though technically, TWFAF is only 1/4 a Stevie song. Still, if "Vehicle" can be classified as disco, then anything goes.
Mandisa: For Once in My Life, Do I Do
Mandisa could sing the Stevie Wonder phone book and jam. I'd personally love to see her take on Master Blaster, but I know that won't happen.
Katharine McPhee: Uptight, Part-Time Lover
I fear Kat has this ridiculous impression that because she sang an Aretha Franklin song last week that got praised unjustly, that she's the new Queen of Soul. If so, the first song would be a choice for her, and the title fits her perfectly.
Kellie Pickler: As
Kellie doesn't have much to choose from, either, but if she does sing As, there is a lot of room to countrify it naturally.
Lisa Tucker: You are the Sunshine of My Life, Ribbon in the Sky, They Won't Go When I Go.
Whatever she does, it's going to sound like the fourth round of Star Search. Maybe they'll let her accompany herself on that snazzy gold electric guitar.
Paris Bennett: Sir Duke, Never Had a Dream Come True, Don't You Worry 'Bout a Thing.
Webster probably thinks she can sing any Stevie song she chooses. HA! Look for her to be dressed in a daishiki and her wig to be conrowed and macramed.
Melissa: From the Bottom of My Heart
Someone is going to have to draw the short straw and be forced to sing one of Stevie's new songs, since he's a guest and we all have to pretend he's still relevant instead of admitting he hasn't written a decent song since 1982. Since there is NOTHING for Melissa to sing, otherwise, and they won't let her twirl a baton like she did in the Miss Mary Kay Cosmetics Pageant, she'll get stuck with the dog.
Boy, I wish Gedeon had stayed. He could have torn up on at least half a dozen songs.
posted by kieran at 12:53 PM
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